If Carlsberg made a hotel I reckon it would have: PlayStation 3’s and huge flat screen TV’s in the bedrooms, pool parties hosted by the best DJ’s in the world and they would probably build it on the sexiest strip of beach on one of the world’s best party islands. I bet Carlsberg wish they had made Ushuaia Ibiza Beach Hotel.
For Ushuaia is not just an Ibiza hotel. Ushuaia is a destination, an ‘it’ venue. The events at Ushuaia are not merely pool parties, they are carnivals; festivals of light and sound with circus acts and banging tunes. I’m not going to lie, the F*** Me I’m Famous Closing Party I attended at Ushuaia over the Bank Holiday weekend, actually blew my mind.
We arrived at Ushuaia just before 5pm. As the searing heat of the Ibiza sun began to fade, the revellers trickled in and began lining the edge of the cordoned off pool. We didn’t know where to look: at the models in the water floating around on a giant pair of lips, at the inflatable balls flying through the air, or at the female duo warming up the decks on the stage, which was clearly made to produce jaw dropping effects. Stewards adorned us with branded paraphernalia; neon visors, transfer tattoos, even the plastic cups were plastered with the name of the event (a creation of David Guetta and his wife Cathy). Anywhere else this might be tacky, but at Ushuaia Ibiza it’s all part of the party package.
The sun set, Fedde le Grand began his set, and the sound and light projections got even more impressive. At this point it would make perfect sense to show you a video of said impressive display. Except it later transpired that I was so animatedly singing, shouting and dancing for most of the night, little of the video evidence is salvageable. I did get it together to film some of the closing moments of the David Guetta set though. As you watch the video just imagine how amazing this would feel live!
Shortly before I filmed this clip, stewards had appeared brandishing flashing glow sticks, seemingly for every one of the 6000 strong crowd. We all waved them manically. A shadow appeared to be moving over the complex, caught in the beam of a laser light we could see it was a giant bunch of red balloons (maybe 99 – there wasn’t time to count!) Mesmerized, the crowd seemed to be waving their sticks in the balloons direction. Something caught my eye and after much squinting I could confirm that yes, there was in actual fact a bendy gymnast dangling from the balloons and floating above the crowd. Just when you think you’ve seen it all…
It was at this point I glanced around at the hotel guests dancing on their balconies and wished I were one of them. Swilling cold beer from their minibars, dancing as they dressed (I spied one lady brushing her teeth in a towel whilst casually bopping to Guetta live from her balcony), the guests have front row seats to the best pool party in Ibiza every single night. Entrance to Guetta’s event at Ushuaia for non-hotel guests is 70 Euros in advance or 80 Euros on the door. If you are staying at the hotel it is included free of charge. Non-guests can save on drinks by purchasing vouchers from stands in the venue – offers include 6 beers for 10 euros each instead of 12 – but you can be certain guests paid a fraction of that price for their beers from the supermarket.
When I visited Ushuaia earlier on that day I felt like I was on the Xtra Factor. Glam guests lounged on padded sun loungers as the crew stealthily prepared for the next event around them. If the stage preparations get too distracting there are other places guests can relax; like the sound-proofed chill out section with swim-up bar and bedrooms, the beds on the beach, the spa, gym or Japanese restaurant.
The minimally decorated bedrooms induce a chilled out vibe, enhanced by your choice of in-room scent and mood lighting. The hotel has its quirky touches too; fat plastic ladies in the gym, scorpions (also plastic!) up the wall, and Facebook check in points dispersed around the hotel, to help the socially connected guest really rub their every luxurious move around Ushuaia in the faces of their friends back home.
The event at Ushuaia was the highlight of my time in Ibiza, possibly even my year. You have to go and see it for yourself. Full listings of events can be found here.
Like everything in Ibiza bedrooms at Ushuaia aren’t cheap – the cheapest I have seen online is £300 per night for a standard room. But if you are going to Ibiza to party (and who isn’t?!) there is no need to look much further than here.